Savouring every moment: my everything Christmas edit

And so my friends, it’s time. You might remember that I decided not to do much of a retail Christmas on Midlifechic last year because I was feeling a bit burnt out. I’ve been bringing Christmas to life for readers since I very first started editing Selfridges magazine in 1993 and last year I just needed a break. But this year I’m back!

It feels as though this is going to be a seminal Christmas for us. Firstly of course, we’ll feel the absence of mum-in-law who has always been such a big part of it. Just last year she had us crying with laughter as she attempted to join in every game, openly admitting that she’d use her dementia to her advantage if it meant she could use it to overwrite all the rules and win. I’m so glad the boys took lots of videos because we’ll watch them on Christmas Day and toast her, with a chuckle and a glass of Baileys. And behind those chuckles will be yet one more realisation that she’s gone… and that our lives have changed measurably this year (and I mean measurably).

And then there’s the fact that this may be our last Christmas as a five. The eldest and his girlfriend are already talking about not being apart for Christmases future now that they’ve moved in together. I’ve been so lucky to have had a full brood at home for Christmas since I first became a mum 31 years ago this December. I know those days are numbered.

So this year I’m going to savour every single moment. The boys are intransigent when it comes to our long-established Christmas traditions and that’s been hard to work around in the past but this year I’m going to relish their pleasure in the past that we built together.

And I’m fully enjoying this part, the anticipation of planning it all. So I’m hoping you’ll come along with me for all of it and who better to start us off than John Lewis who’ve invited me to pull together an ‘everything Christmas’ post by delving deep into their wares. I have it all for you today.

There’s what I’ll be wearing for a real life December (rather than the glitz and glamour presented in the adverts). I’ve dug around for presents for people who already have everything and just need to know they’ve been thought of and the games that will be coming out in our house as soon as the plates have been cleared. Our tree has a few 70s nods this year too because I’m acknowledging that my life with Mal is moving on as well. So I’m celebrating the fact that there’s still an ‘us’ as the boys go… we have our own new beginning to soften the ending.

Let’s crack on. Everything is linked so you don’t have to go hunting and if something has gone in your size by the time you click, keep checking back because we’re a bit ahead of the game here and they’re adding more stock every week.

My Christmas isn’t black tie any more, that came to an abrupt halt with lockdown and although I loved the dressing up, I don’t miss the dreary formal events that came with it. This year for us the party side of things is all in November with a few live music events and lots of dancing. My December events are low key – the pub with friends or chatting in somebody else’s kitchen with a glass in my hand… a day of Christmas shopping with cocktail stops… a long lunch with our best friends… a carol service… panto with the boys… and then the day itself.

So the outfits that I’m planning are equally low key with as much colour as I can work in – although that isn’t easy this year because black is really dominant. It means that even I’ve had to succumb to it and because I never usually wear it, it feels quite fresh. And there are a couple of ideas for party shoes, I won’t wear anything higher than a kitten heel on my feet because it’s hard to enjoy the laughter when your feet are throbbing. Acquired wisdom can make life much more fun can’t it?

There are four concepts, all from John Lewis and I’ve told you the sizes I went for so you can see how they come up. I’m usually a 12.

This is the one for a meal out or the theatre, when you want to look as though you’ve made an effort but not too much. The black flared jeans are from my new favourite trouser-maker – an even better fit than Me+Em and about 25% less in price. These are high on the waist, unbelievably comfortable and just long enough to wear with a heel in my usual 12 regular. Note the stitched seam at the front which visually slims and lengthens. They come in petite as well which is graded (i.e. completely recut rather than just shortened so you still have the drama of the flare).

The top is the diva in this outfit. A star print blouse from John Lewis’s latest collab, black with scattered gold stars. There’s a flattering deep V-neck and the frill at the hem will disguise any indulgence as you step away from the table. I hadn’t expected to like this as much as I did but the quality is superb; it’s a very dense black and the stars are super shiny. There are lots of frills but because it’s been so well designed they aren’t too flouncy. Frills usually make me think ‘girly’ but this top is all woman. I tried it on with blue jeans too and I think I liked it even better worn that way, it gave a great high/low look. I’m wearing a size 12 and it’s true to size.

Star print blouse; black flared jeans

I’d always far rather go to a party in jeans and a great top than a dress these days. I like dresses on hot summer days but in winter they tend to just make me feel overdone. Now we’ve already discussed the arrival of straight-leg jeans as an antidote to the volume of barrels and wide-legs that have dominated the last few years.

These washed black straight leg jeans are the best I’ve tried so far which makes them a great foundation piece for your wardrobe. They’re extremely comfortable and that’s so important with jeans – a lot of brands don’t give you enough room in the seat, especially with a lower rise but these are cut for a real woman. They’re mid-rise with a clean straight leg, so they don’t fight with whatever you put on top and I have three different tops to show you. Asymmetric hemmed tops are one of the key ways of updating your outfits this season but you need to wear them with a straighter cut jean like this. They’ll work with a wide-leg too but avoid a flare because there would just be too much going on.

You won’t be surprised that I was drawn to this red satin cowl neck and you can see that being cut on the slant, it drapes rather than clings so it’s an easy choice for anyone wanting to skim over their midriff. The quality of the satin is excellent, it’s heavy so it hangs beautifully. And the cut at the shoulders is extremely flattering, almost like a halter, coming into the gathered cowl neckline which is always kind to older necks.

Red satin cowl neck; washed black straight leg jeans; silver leather ankle boots

And I just want to mention the silver leather ankle boots because if you haven’t got a pair yet, where have you been? They’re only ever released at Christmas but as you know, I wear them all year round because they make such a huge difference to any plain outfit, especially a column of navy. These are made from soft leather and they have the best kind of heel, one that looks narrow from the side profile but is balanced in width so you won’t wobble and it’s only just over an inch high. All the elegance, none of the discomfort.

Silver leather ankle boots

Back to the jeans and a nice top outfits. For something a little more muted, the champagne metallic top has the same sort of drape as the red and it catches the light every time you move. It’s cut broader on the shoulders if you prefer more coverage and it’s very straight so it’s a great choice for column shapes. I felt it came up a bit big in a size 12 so my advice would be to size down on this one.

Champagne metallic top; washed black straight leg jeans

Then there’s a midriff disguising alternative, an ivory halterneck with a bubble hem that ties at the neck and it’s cut to really show off your shoulders. It’s taken me a while to get my eye around a bubble hem but I now see how good they are for defining the waist whilst also skimming over it – it’s my new top choice for a night of dancing. I love, love, love this top, it’s the one that will be updating my usual ‘out out’ outfits this winter. It’s superb quality and it’s true to size. I’ve put the flared jeans on again because this is my silhouette of choice but this little top would work with both straight and wide too… and barrel.

Halterneck with a bubble hem; black flared jeans

Ok so bear with me on this one. I’ve spent a bit of time in both London and Newcastle over the last month and the one thing I’ve noticed is the proliferation of shorts. Yes. In winter.

It took me a while to adjust but a couple of weekends ago we went to a big DJ event in Newcastle. It was Michael Gray who is pretty well known and he brought an entourage of chic midlifers from London with him. Almost every one of the women was wearing shorts in either leather, velvet or sequins… with tights… and they looked fantastic. I was chatting to some of them in the loos and the great point they made was that it’s much easier to sit on a bar stool in a pair of shorts than a mini-skirt. So I wanted to try some. I wear mini-skirts far more than midis in winter anyway… here we go.

These black shorts have a soft feathery texture, a high waist and pleats at the front and I went up to a 14 for a bit of extra room which was the right thing to do – when you’re wearing something a bit skimpier than usual you don’t want anything bulging.
Because the shorts are a bit ‘out there’ I’ve kept the rest of the outfit pared down with a close-fitting black top with long sleeves and this is a great (and relatively reasonable) find, even if you wear it with jeans. The fabric feels fantastic, it’s smooth and it holds you in. I’m wearing a 12 and it’s true to size, if you want it to be less skintight, go up.

The sparkly crystal tights make it into a party outfit but it’s so long since I’ve worn sheer tights that I’d forgotten the need to smooth them up your legs slowly to ensure the opacity is the same all the way up.
On my feet are some beautiful velvet mules from the big collab with a satin bow and a heel that’s still below two inches. I’m a 7.5 so I ordered an 8 and they were right.

Black feather shorts; Close-fitting black top; Sparkly crystal tights; Velvet mules

And I did find some colour, my favourite, red from top to toe – you can’t beat it at Christmas or any time of year. This outfit would take you to work, to drinks, to a carol service, to the theatre… it’s a real multi-tasker and as such it’s been selling fast since I took these photos so it’s one you’ll need to stalk the site for restocks.

The red tailored trousers have a leg-lengthening sharp crease down the front and a mid rise. Once again they’re unbelievably comfortable, it’s like wearing soft leggings because they just stretch with your body. The fit was perfect for me in a 12R but they also come in petite. The red high neck blouse is breathable soft viscose that skims rather than clings and the long sleeves mean you won’t shiver. And cleverly it has a small slit at the bust that hints at a bit of skin – if you cover every bit of your body it looks frumpy so always remember to have a little skin on show somewhere, even if you’re just pulling up your sleeves to show your wrists. Tuck this blouse in and wear the whole lot in one colour for a jumpsuit effect without the loo worries… and then wear each piece with other items as separates. I’m wearing a size 12 and it’s perfect, both the blouse and trousers come in petite.

Red tailored trousers; red high neck blouse

If, like me, you try to avoid the easy route of gift sets and socks, it means you have to look a lot harder. This year I’ve been to the outer reaches of the John Lewis site and uncovered a few things I’d never have thought to look for.

The adult males in your life are where most gift guides let you down so I’ll start there. If he plays chess (or would like people to think he does) this orange horse chess set is sculptural enough to leave out on the coffee table.

A tabletop fire pit doesn’t smoke so you can sit outside on Boxing Day wrapped in blankets and pretend you live in Copenhagen.

Or how about a Rubik’s cube, because he never did finish the one he had in 1981.

For the man with a shoebox of old mixtapes in the loft there’s a mint green cassette player that works with Bluetooth headphones (a bit of an oxymoron I know!).

Or there’s a hand-painted parrot corkscrew that cuts the foil with its beak (they’re so often entertained by these small details).

My personal favourite is a bottle of boujie poo drops (yes really, I know for a fact that my boys would be endlessly delighted by them). You put a few in the loo after you go and nobody’s any the wiser.

If he’s been exceptionally good, this designer balloon dog lamp is cool and it glows away on a bedside table or a desk. I have a friend who bought this for her husband after their last dog died. They’ve agreed not to have any more and so it’s a joyful tribute.

For grown-up children who’ve left home there’s a Bluetooth speaker that looks like a small guitar amp and has great reviews.

Teenagers are mad for old-fashioned phone receivers that plug into their mobiles which makes me feel a thousand years old.

There’s a boogie light that pulses to their music for the bedroom,

… and a bubble tea kit might stop them spending all their pocket money on it.

Parents are trickier the older they get because they genuinely don’t want more stuff. I love this though if you want to push the boat out, a bird feeder with a camera in it that photographs whatever turns up in the garden, identifies the species and sends pictures to their phone.

Over the years we’ve found that proper walking umbrellas go down well at the stage when they know they probably need a walking stick but aren’t ready to accept it. They’re a dignity saver.

Thoughtful little extras can include a backlit bedside clock with huge numbers…

… and a jar opener.

If you’re going round to someone’s for drinks, take something they can eat or drink rather than something they have to find a cupboard for. This giant cracker is great for them to pull and enjoy over the rest of Christmas.

Anyone who brings me this champagne truffle set knows they have my heart forever…

… or something like this biscuit set is great for those lazy Twixmas mornings in bed with a book and a coffee. In fact give it with a book and a pack of coffee if you want to make sure they get the message that it’s for them, not to share.

For neighbours you can’t beat a panettone with a bottle of prosecco and cocktail crackers with four ready-mixed cocktails inside are a good thing to turn up with on New Year’s Eve/Day. There’s a set of mini Cornish gins too, and I really like the sound of the rhubarb and raspberry one.

For your favourite reader buddy there’s a book nook kit. Mal bought me one of these last year and it builds into an intricate lit-up bookshop to slot in between the books on your shelf.

These pearl and diamante earrings will make a best friend think of you whenever she’s out having a good time.

And nobody can ever have enough cashmere handwarmers (nine colours available).

Then there are the animals. I’m wondering if you can teach a midlife dog new tricks because we’ve been told Ted is highly trainable and this trick kit looks like it would keep everyone in the house entertained for a while.

Alfie* will ignore whatever he’s given but I’m trying anyway. There’s a laser pointer for him to chase…

… and I love the concept of this tiny cowboy outfit … but I don’t fancy my chances!

* Some of you will know from Instagram that we said a heartbreaking goodbye to Alfie on Tuesday. I’d already enjoyed looking writing this and looking forward to Christmas with him so I can’t bear to take it out. We’ve had a very sad few days but reading this still makes me smile.

In our house the games come out as soon as we’ve finished eating. I know everyone thinks it’s weird that we don’t open any presents until late at night but for us the games are what Christmas Day has always been about. In my mind the togetherness is the point and gifts are just tokens of thought.

This ‘date the hits’ is our new one for this Christmas. We’ve heard so many people raving about it and it’ll be good to see how much of a music legacy we’ve instilled in our boys. You scan a card, a song plays and you have to put it in the right year on your timeline, so teenagers and grandparents are suddenly on level terms.

There’s a misheard lyrics game along the same lines but sillier, where you guess the song from the words everyone gets wrong.

As I said at the beginning, I’ve added disco to our collection this year. This little disco mouse came home with me last week, rather appropriately from Newcastle.

John Lewis are on fire with their decorations this year. They have a whole disco tree theme going on called The Enthusiast with some wild baubles, you can see them all here.

And I thought their Curate and Collect theme was another really interesting one…

with lots of foodie related baubles (from the sublime to the ridiculous!).

I try really hard not to buy too many new decorations because we already have a cellar full of them but I thought this mini wreath would be really good for a coffee table or side table with a candle glowing in the middle.

I need to stop bombarding you with pictures but don’t miss out on the mix tape baubles or the ‘Ho Ho Ho’ Etch A Sketch one.

I could go on but I’m sure you have a weekend to get on with – if you’ve made it this far, I thank you. I’m looking forward to our chats as we build up to Christmas. For me it’s always encouraging to hear how people work the whole festive season out as it changes. Midlife is such a time of ongoing adjustment isn’t it?

So happy shopping – and it probably all feels a bit early but we know how this time of year goes… we’ll be taking the decorations down again before we can believe it. And just in case you’ve missed it, this year’s John Lewis Christmas ad will get you in the mood – how fantastic to have Kristin Scott-Thomas playing the lead. Isn’t it good to see John Lewis valuing the older customer who often is the one with enough time, joy and experience to make Christmas magical?

Disclosure: ‘Savouring every moment: my everything Christmas edit’ was commissioned by John Lewis but I was given full editorial control over products chosen, words and photos.

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